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WoGs in Space: A DQ Adventure
AKA the Incoming Boing
by Gremalkyn, as posted on the Women of Gotham Message Board

On the bridge of the USS Words of Prey...

Captain Hysert sat in her command chair, reviewing the daily reports. Everything was running quite smoothly, which usually meant trouble was not far off.

"Unknown vessel de-cloaking off the port quarter," announced Lieutenant Soapdish at Tactical.

"Shields!" Captain Hysert was instantly on her feet.

"Her weapons are energized, Captain."

"Helm, erratic maneuvers," ordered Hysert.

"My specialty," replied Lieutenant past47.

The unknown vessel was of perculiar design and seemed to not have any overly aggressive weapons. A quick scan of the vessel revealed three things:

1) The primary weapon systems were some type of beam weapon (probably charged plasma) and an enveloping weapon (probably a tractor beam or stasis generator).

2) There was only one person on board, probably some form of humanoid.

3) The name scrawled along the bow of the ship read "Death Quaker."

"Incoming!" announced Soapdish.

past47, at the helm, initiated an eratic sideslip that both avoided the plasma stream (which was curiously reminiscent of cherry kool-aid) and aligned the WoG's weapons to bear down on the interloper. past47 would later be awarded a minor commendation for the maneuver, as he actually started off wholly off center, yet somehow managed to wind up exactly where everyone wanted to be. Very curious, that.

The Executive Officer, Commander Ford, arrived on the bridge. She took a quick look around, then stood next to the Captain.


Soapdish was cut off as a strange field enveloped the WoG.

"Gosh, I feel so happy," cooed past47.

Hysert and Ford hugged one another in a scene of friendship and mutual admiration rarely displayed on the bridge of a starship.

"Ooo," cooed Soapdish. "Our new friend wants to chat."

"Okay," bounced Hysert. Ford grinned like a small child at Christmas.

"Warm fuzzies to you all," spoke the pilot of the other vessel. "I am the Death Quaker, and you have been boinged."


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All original materials © 2003 R. Pickard